Donate or Else!!

If there's one thing I can't stand (and we all know there are many!) it's the incessant harassment by the clipboard crews. You know who I'm talking about: they lurk outside stores, in town centers and street corners waiting to pounce like you're live meat ready to be taken out.
Yes I am having a Mean Girls moment picturing the jungle madness of this scenario...





"Chuggers" as these delightful people are nicknamed (Charity muggers!) are everywhere! Literally, in the UK it's difficult to head out for a spin around town or for a coffee with friends without being cornered by one of these suckers, usually trying to get you to part with your last few pennies for some sick child.

I hate these people. Not because they're trying to raise money for the charity but because they guilt trip you into donating to a cause you actually don't believe in at all and when you say no, guess who is the asshole!

Don't get me wrong, I get that everyone has to hustle in some way or another but this just violates my personal space, with the result being that the only thing I want to donate is a swift right hook to the face of whichever member of the clipboard mafia has encroached upon my space.

I am a charity crusader: I run races to raise money, I hold events and I donate straight from my pocket. But I only do this for charities I believe in.

I've been told I was "self-entitled" for having this opinion (because I didn't support the flooding or whatever is was in the Philippines, which is a good job because I could then donate money to help the Brits who were hit by flooding a few months later!) and you know what? I don't give a crap! I know that at the end of the day, I support charities that help UK residents because frankly, the outside world never bails us out in times of need. I'm not against charities for everything else but leave me be to donate to the charities I choose.

So imagine my horror when I was strolling through the square of Hotel de Ville (yes that is a real place, no Cruella does not live there... Sadly!) and was accosted by........ GREENPEACE!!!

The irony of the whole situation was that I was wearing my very real leather jacket... and boots. So I had to keep the animal rights nazis happy without being bludgeoned for my fashion choices. And then they followed me around the square with their clipboards until I threw 2 euros at them and ran into the nearest shop.



I disagree with how Greenpeace go about their business and they have been linked to several shady events but to be honest, I don't judge those who support them. But man if there weren't a mob of the clipboard crew then I would have bitchslapped that chugger for invading my space and then stalking me on my afternoon off!

When I'm rich and able to juggle my own finances, I will donate but until the day my bank account looks like Lord Sugar's you can bet your ass I will not be parting with £2 every month for a charity I don't support. Until that time, can you not try to mug me on my lunch break or corner me when I'm shopping in the value section of tesco because I cannot afford the better brands!!