The Older I Get....

..... The more I know my own mind. Which means I have a lower tolerance for crap. And let me tell you friends, there has been an all out crap slinging contest going on in the world lately! Whether it's the age old females vs males rubbish, or the poorly educated fools hashing it out in the streets baring all in their Primark leggings and flip flops, it seems that 2014 is the year to make an absolute tit of yourself!

Keep it classy ladies!

Let me just make a few points to back up my case: 

• #MANTIME

Yes that's right ladies, if you like the smell of these bad boys then tough shit! You ain't a man, so you ain't getting man time in the shower! Unless you do man things like me; such as working out and eating Yorkie chocolate bars (which FYI are not for girls) in which case you're probably actually a dude! Hash tag MANTIME! 

• "CLIFF HILLARD" and his absurd point of view.

I am the first to wave the banner of body love whether it be a curvy lady or a skinny lady or even a surgically altered lady, love yourselves people! But apparently we're wrong for having a variety of female body types in advertising with men claiming it is shattering their ideals of women. HOW DARE WE PORTRAY REALISTIC IMAGES??? 

In the article some sociologist dude says that men should be able to look in a magazine and see an airbrushed model otherwise it's just destroying their egos and their confidence. 

“Here you’ve got a generation of boys who will grow up looking at women in the media and seeing flaws here, flaws there, flaws everywhere—what are they supposed to think?” said Hillard (the sociologist).

How about young boys grow up thinking that women do have flaws, in fact even the models in airbrushed images have flaws! Why is it so wrong that they grow up to know the truth? I don't think it's images of different female body shapes that are crushing the male confidence but in fact their own unrealistic set of images in advertising. I mean really, what average guy looks like David Beckham in a CK advert? That would be detrimental to any male ego....

*NOTE: The Onion (original post here) and its views may be satirical but I guarantee some fool will actually have this opinion in all seriousness...*

• LADY FIGHTS!

Oh I do love a good brawl.... Not. It's just so unsightly seeing women throw down in the street to draw blood. In my home town, it's not all that unusual to see a couple of ladieeez having a blazing row in the street or town centre, so imagine how my homesickness was cured a little by watching two chicks hashing it out on the street in France! 

But this was no H-Town punch up!! Ohh no, it was all about the scratching and hair pulling!! I have heard my fair share of obscenities but usually they are silenced with a right hook to the face but not here!! These "ladies" were more focused on keeping their hair pretty to actually get down and dirty.
It made me wonder what the hell was the point?? Seriously, be a lady and have some class by not fighting and if you insist on making a total tit of yourself in public then bitch please!!! Do it properly!! 

So there you have it folks... Some stellar examples of how 2014 is shaping up to be the year of the idiot. 

In the words of Mr T.......

Argh! If I ever catch you acting like a crazy fool again, you're gonna meet my friend pain!